In the modern world teen years are a risky business. Risk behaviors are activities that teens would participate in to fit in or just to impress someone. These decisions are what can cause teens to fail in school and ruin their future. Homosexuality is a form of risky business and can interfere with ones learning and self esteem. Teen sexual orientation should be allowed without the discrimination from others.
Most people find sexual orientation to be disturbing, and would usually shun those who are gay. When people do this it forces homosexuals to hide who they really are so that they can fit in. Teens would hide because of the fear that they might get bullied. If they choose to hide what they are going through then no one would know that they are facing problems. These people would have to seek help in secret and this could interfere with school work because the teacher might not know what he or she is dealing with.
Most teens will end up getting bullied by there peers because of who they choose to like. The most common type of bullying that occurs is verbal bulling when teens would walk up to a person and tease them. The second most common thing is cyber-bullying where teens can bully kids at there homes from the comfort of their own home. This could lower a students self-esttem and confidence and they will never get anywhere in life. Teens need to realize that even without violence it still hurts.
If a teen gets bullied enough they might commit suicide. Research has shown that thirty percent of all suicides are because of teens getting bullied for their sexual orientation. In a national survey it showed that 760 teens were bullied because of their homosexuality. That number is big and it needs to shrink. Bullycide is the constant abuse from others on the internet and that will begin to create fear and confusion in a teen.
Teen homosexuality is a choice and the problem is the pain that others cause. This a is a risky behavior that will interfere with another's learning. If you already know that they're gay then don't constantly keep on harassing them. No teen should suffer from the abuse just because of their decision to be gay. It's their choice and their right who to like who they want.
The one thing that I like about your essay was that it wasn't just slamming the reader with informational facts. Although maybe you should have a little more facts, but I like it the way it is. I also like your opening and your "clincher statement." they really draw the reader in and stays in the readers mind (:
ReplyDeleteI found the way you approached the essay good in how you kept things to the point but still didnt skip any details out. You were able to maintain that clearness throughout your essay. I like your clincher statement. However, to make it stronger, you could try and intensify parts of the essay by adding facts or other research you found. Other than that, your essay was fantastic. Keep up the good work Christian ~
ReplyDeleteAs stated by your group members. Add much more research, facts, statistics. This will help support your opinions and reasoning. Also, you need to focus your introduction a bit more. You briefly mention your topic in the last sentence. You need to do a better job introducing and discussing the topic a bit more. Thesis needs to be a lot stronger and focused. AS(2+)
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