I'm the soldier
that never loses composer,
but right now the fate of the squad rests on my shoulders
The squad is like my family
We look out for each other hourly
Right now it seems like the battle we won it
except I spent to much energy on it honestly I'm exhausted
Although it feels like a dream
"rangers lead the way" is what we scream
At the reaction of the first downed Black Hawk
Need to complete poem. Remeber avoid using "like" that is a simile and we are trying to do allusions. IF you are alluding to the story of the event of "black hawk down" you need to describe that even and at the same time connect it to your own personal story. Please make these adjustments and also please check your spelling "composer" is spelt wrong. AS(1+)
ReplyDeleteHi Christian:)
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your poem & although I don't really understand it because I haven't seen that movie, I think I would get it if I saw the movie. Besides that, can't wait I see your final:)
You need to finish your poem so that I can fully understand it. However, I can see what your alluding to but, I have no clue what the Black Hawk Down is because I haven't seen the movie or book or whatever it is. -_-. Other than that you should be good!
ReplyDelete